12 hours in a car with Tom Hanks

That will be me, tomorrow. In a feeble effort to prepare myself for the undertaking, I will endeavor to compile an update of where we're at… perhaps to help myself understand why this is something I’m actually looking forward to!
As I’ve mentioned, Tom was assigned to work in the Neenah office in January. The project started out as a 6-week assignment, and he’s been working pretty steadily at it ever since. He’s worked on it from Raleigh, but even more, he’s worked on it from here. It has been FANTASTIC to have him around, to be able to spend time with him, and to be able to go and visit him when he’s been in Raleigh. But I think we were both pretty-dang relieved when he received and signed a job offer at the Neenah office – and actually got a start date!
This meant taking a step forward on figuring out what to do with his condo back in Raleigh, and beginning to think about where to live in the Fox Valley. As of right now – he has a good friend in Raleigh who’s going to rent from him (so no condo selling in this real estate market – hooray!) and he’s checked out several potential places to live in the area.
Tom writing now.  Anticipate monosyllables, grunts, and gestures.  With this crazy pace to life, we didn’t finalize plans for Memorial Day weekend until…well, I’m not sure they ever really got finalized.  We did book flights back to Raleigh the week before, planning to head out Wed. night, with Angela returning to Wisconsin Monday and me returning … sometime. 
Wed. night I don’t think I was a cheery, optimistic traveling companion (Angela can confirm).  Logistics still weren’t totally determined for the trip, I’d had a tough three days at work, and I was worried about seeing everyone I wanted to see.  But, the flights went smoothly and we had a nice time traveling together, discussing shared values and how to handle money.  Looking back, I think we came to a two-pronged approach:  create healthy environments where people can connect, and dedicate resources as necessary to cultivate a healthy attitude in ourselves. Pretty cool stuff.
Thursday went pretty well for both of us; I enjoyed catching up with the Raleigh coworkers and Angela had a productive time working out of my Dad’s place.  That evening, Ang got to meet some friends of mine at a dinner at the Mellow Mushroom.  Adam is a large man:  6’5, 340, with a genial disposition and a passion for interesting ideas.  Brandie, his girlfriend, is not nearly as tall and is a comedienne par excellence; she’s extremely expressive and funny, doing impressions or original bon mots.  After great pizza we were fortunately able to catch her improv show at ComedyWorx down the street.  Hilarity ensued, as campers quested on the mesa for a port-a-potty. 
We both took Friday off, ostensibly to pack.  However, one of us (Angela) took her sweet time in the morning enjoying a leisurely breakfast and conversation with my Dad.  Then, we had to purchase boxes, and there happened to be an REI nearby, and –is that a sale sign?  It is!—we were delayed.  We did enjoy a wonderful lunch at the French restaurant Coquette.  Angela had her first Croque Monsieur, a sandwich that is the Big Mac of France; the blackberry tart for dessert was amazing.  The French do not agree with the thought of healthy eating, which means their cuisine is heavy with butter, eggs, sugar, and deliciousness.
After a great evening with my family Friday night, including a dinner at Souper! Salad!, a nice salad buffet, we got around to the hardcore packing, and homework, on Saturday.  Everything came together pretty well, though we had to enlist my friend Michael’s help after we had promised him a movie.  We did browse some art galleries and I got a few items to brighten up my cube, and we had a nice dinner outside in Cameron Village and played some frisbee in Fletcher park, so I don’t think anybody was complaining too much. 
Annnd… back to Angela-as-author. Sunday morning I wrapped up my homework assignment (oof!) while Tom and his dad moved boxes and puttered around. We had been debating all weekend about how we were going to get back to Wisconsin, and had finally agreed that we’d take a road trip! That way, Tom would have his car in Wisconsin and… well, we both like road trips! Tom Sr. had the great idea of accompanying us (which means Tom Jr and I got to ride in the Corvette for the beginning of the trip – thank you Tom!) as far as the Hanks family cemetery plot in western Virginia. The Hanks had been settled there for a while before a certain Thomson and Caroline, ages 20 and 16 respectively, headed out in a covered wagon and settled in eastern Nebraska… which is where Tom Sr. grew up! We stopped on the way at Pilot Mountain, where we saw tons of black vultures, mountain laurel in bloom, and some of Tom’s favorite rock-climbing routes. We then had a neat time heading on toward the cemetery and, once there, wandering around the grave markers and talking about what Tom and his dad had both figured out through researching the family and the area.
Then it was time to part company. Tom and I bid his dad farewell (he had a neat trip back with more historical discoveries as part of his journey) and took off for Wisconsin. Traffic was great in spite of the fact that it was Memorial Day, and we really just had a lovely time traveling together. Just before we took off, Tom asked me, "are you ready for 12 hours in a car with Tom Hanks?" I guess I was!

Abby

While I was in North Carolina this weekend, I learned that my cousin Abby died unexpectedly from complications from a surgery she'd had back in January. 

Abby is a year younger than me.

We were close growing up.

I hadn't seen her in several years, but was planning(?) to visit her and her husband Jeremy in Arizona "one of these days."

Abby stands out as a sweet woman, with many qualities I wish I had...

Abby had some terrible struggles. She dealt with them openly and with vulnerability. Her strength and courage were hard-won and beautiful on her.

I spent tonight looking for glimpses of her through old photo albums. None of my pictures came close to capturing what she is like, what she meant to me.

I know my grief is tiny compared with that of Jeremy and her siblings and parents - but oh, Abby, how I will miss you.

twirly whirly

k, aren't "twirl" and "whirl" both lovely words?

Hello from the air somewhere between Wisconsin and Florida! Tammy, Jamie and I are going to meet Tony there for a kayaking trip to the barrier islands for the weekend. Since I may want to post about our time there, I'm thinkin' it's high time I put an update out here covering the last few months!


Thanksgiving
For this lovely holiday, I headed to Raleigh to celebrate with Tom's family. We had fun fixing an incredible meal and just hanging out. I had met baby Elise before  Then we were joined by our friend Sam and his wife Hope, and took off for an exploration of some Civil War battlefields. Tom Sr. did the driving honors, and the five of us just really had a blast touring Richmond and learning about the characters and scope of the site of two major battles of the Civil War.

Christmas
Christmas was drawn out and lovely with one highlight being that a group of game night folks and my college roommate Jocelyn went to a Handel's Messiah performance at the PAC. We had a great evening kicked off at an Indian Restaurant and ending in a snow bank. Well, nearly ending there - there was a big blizzard that left me and Jocey in a snow drift until some enthusiastic college kids helped us out!

The next weekend saw the congregation of Amy's side of the family the week before Christmas. Nine of us (me, Tom, Amy, Tim, Grandma Beth, Augusta, Chris, Grant and Margo) crammed into my 2-bedroom apartment and really just had a blast. My friend Katie and her daughter Annabelle stopped by on Saturday (Amy and Augusta hadn't yet met little Annabelle). And then Korean food, talking, sledding, x-c skiing, playing with Margo, presents and games - what could be better?! (side note: I received a camera for Christmas last year and took it kayaking this summer. I bought a dry bag for it, but somehow enough moisture collected in it to kill my camera. I was sick about it! I tried to get it repaired locally and online and nothing could be done - the repair cost more than the value of the camera. So imagine my delight when my fabulous boyfriend gave me a camera as a Christmas present: this time one that is WATERPROOF and shockproof! He's been testing the shockproof side of things - I think he's dropped in on solid ice twice now and the camera still works great :). We'll see how it does kayaking in Florida!).

Christmas proper was spent with our families, Tom in Raleigh and me in Eau Claire. My nieces and nephews are just the best small people out there (sorry, everyone else!) and we really just had a lovely time being together, eating great food, laughing, and playing games with the kids.

New Year's
It's become a tradition! New Year's with Jen and Mustafa in the Twin Cities. This time around, the group was me, Tom, Jonathan from CA, Jen's brother AJ, and Jen and Moosie. Friday we did a guided tour of the Guthrie theater that was just fascinating, and we had fun exploring the city, playing games (ever played Ra? It's a board game that you can play on the iPad!), running around, eating many marvelous things that Jen cooked, and just having a good time with friends we see far too infrequently.

Happy News
In early January, Tom's boss asked him if he'd like to work on a short term project in Neenah, Wisconsin! Once he confirmed that it would work, he had about three days to pack up his life for the next 6-8 weeks and take off for the northern hinterlands. And golly have we been having a blast. We've used weekends to hang out and catch up with friends within a 7 hour radius. Tom grew up and went to school in Iowa, so one weekend we went down there to see family and friends and get a tour of his college campus and home town - that was the 7 hour one! We've really just had a great time catching up with friends and family. The time has also been filled with game night, church small group, cross country skiing, racquetball, game playing, and...Wednesday Night Date Night. You wouldn't believe how much more fun it is to date someone who lives 15 minutes away vs. 15 hours or whatever it is.

As grateful as I am to the project for bringing him here, I must say that I am NOT grateful for the fact that its intensity kept Tom from being able to join us on this FL trip. Boo! I'm definitely looking forward to the relaxation and good time with awesome people, don't get me wrong. But it sure would be nice if he could be enjoying the warmth and sunshine too.

Well, I believe we're beginning our descent. Au Revoir!

Hello from March already

Hmm, realizing I haven’t put a “life update" out here in a while. Hello world! Let’s see, where to begin… Maybe pictures will best tell the story:
District Conference with the my church’s high schoolers in January

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Pool & Wii with Game Night Crew

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Super Bowl party with Bible study folks

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“Winter Camping”
OK, this one deserves an explanation. My college roommate Jocelyn & I planned on doing winter camping a few weekends ago. When it came right down to it, it was too much to pull together in the midst of busy lives, so Joce came to hang with me for the weekend! We decided to “go domestic” and work on knitting/crocheting projects. I asked Joce to help me figure out how to put together an afghan that Katie and I had knitted a while ago for Ray & Becky’s wedding (we won’t talk about how long ago THAT was), and she ended up helping me actually do it! It was a lot of work, but we did get out for a ski and for some coffee – all in all a lovely weekend. And R & B liked the end result – yipppeee!

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The winter has also included a few night flying trips with Javier, some other weekend trips to visit friends & family in various places, and heaps (though never enough!) of cross country skiing. I’ve had some perfectly marvelous times with my nieces and nephews, who are now 7, 5, 3, and 1 and sweeter and more precious than ever.
Oh, and I met a boy!
For New Year’s I headed over to Minneapolis to hang with Jen & Mustafa as I have for the past few years. This year we were invited to our friends Pete & Amy’s place to celebrate and meet their baby Aiden. Pete’s brother Dan happened to be visiting from Washington DC at the time, and we hit it off. Dan has now come to visit me twice, and I’m just getting back from visiting him for the weekend. Dan lives in Washington DC, so it will be interesting to see how things develop! Here are some pictures that hopefully introduce you a bit. He’s pretty amazing!

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All in all things are going well… later this month I head to Colorado for another yurt trip and then to North Carolina where my baby brother is getting married! Looking forward to good times with friends/family in both locations. I’m also starting another class this month (yippee!) and hoping to finish my first knitted sweater before too long. Fun stuff, huh? :)

swoosh

Ever feel like a leg that's been sat on too long, patiently waiting for the pain and relief of returned blood flow? Yep, that's me at the moment. Life since Monday morning, the morning of Aug. 3 on which I still heard nothing about the funding, feels like it got put on freeze frame advance. I'm not unhappy, but my time has been chocked full of stuff (good, fun stuff) that's allowed me to hold off thinking - or feeling - too much. It hasn't been good for paying bills, returning phone calls, texts, or e-mails. Neither has it been good for figuring out what to do with all the plans/ideas/thoughts that are hovering mid-air, silently waiting for closure or redirection.
I'm thinking I'll head up north for the weekend; not sure if it's to escape, or to push "play" again on my swirling thoughts. The "swoosh" is gonna hurt!

(One thing that has been nice is the amazing presence of friends (here and remote), and the excitement of co-workers that I'm staying after all; they're disappointed for me but genuinely happy for themselves. And golly it's nice to have people around you that like you!)

oh jeepers - she's goin' in

IRD is running into problems with the logistics of the project as it was originally scoped (they're finding it a LOT more expensive than anticipated to do the stuff outlined in the project). That means that pretty much anything could happen. Yes, Shelter has a signed agreement with IRD, but that doesn't mean they still might not change the plan signficantly.

While none of us really knows the future, can I just say that I've been finding it really difficult to cope with my two - and REALLY different - looming futures? Future 1 has the funding for Liberia all falling into place, and me heading out of here in mid-September with a few more shots and my stuff all sold/stored/packed. Future 2 has the funding falling through and me staying here, trying to cope with the bottom falling out of what I've been prepping for and figuring out what to do instead. I know that what will probably happen is something entirely different, but somehow the thought of Future 3 happening isn't exactly comforting - to someone who's already slightly on edge about the whole deal. Go figure!

So yeah, I've been dealing with some mild depression. Nothing debilitating; just lack of energy and initiative for much that needs to be done around here. I'm getting the bare minimum done, but it's taking a lot of effort. And I have lots of unanswered e-mail piling up!

I think I'm coping by existing on multiple levels.

The friend level - Honestly, I think this is a major part of what's keeping me going right now. I haven't had the energy to post about them :) but I've spent some fabulous weekends with close friends and family. I've also had just really good and fun times with the "every day" friends here in Appleton. It's been so huge to just have good quality time with people who care about me and who I just love and admire and like being with so much.

The work level - Work just continues to be awesome. Have I mentioned that I love my job? :) We're doing some really neat projects and I just have great people to work with and great automomy in getting stuff done. The only way that I know something's a bit "off" is that I'm completely emotionally exhausted at the end of the work day - that's just not usual.

The God level - Ok, so I think this one permeates the other levels, but also warrants its own. I've felt a strong need to slow down more and spend time praying and reading and contemplating. It's been really good. I've been feeling down but not unloved or despairing. Probably a good step toward having better reliance on Him while I'm still living in a culture where self-sufficiency is not only possible but expected. We need God here just as much as we would anywhere else, but we have a lot of easily-available crap that we can use to medicate and distract ourselves to keep that need at bay. Having my need exposed is helping me offload at least some of that crap.

Also - the college-age Bible study has been meeting at my apartment this summer. We're studying I Corinthians and it's really been amazing. There are some great thinkers in the group and every week we've been thrashing through all sorts of stuff and finding insights that I haven't seen there before - and I've read the book a lot! Just cool that that there's always more to learn - and fun how other people help you see stuff you wouldn't find on your own (and answer tough questions!).

The book world level - I've been reading like crazy. For me that's always been a great escape. And I hope it's not unhealthy because it's for sure helping me put some distance between myself and the uncertainties in my life for small amounts of time. I just feel guilty when I know I could go pack or organize or clean something and the energy/motivation just isn't there - and so I read or sleep!

Sorry to be so introspective and me-focused; I really don't think I'm the only person in the world with struggles! Thanks for being patient as I stepped back and processed a bit.

Sole Burner!

update: I don't know you you-all managed it, but you landed on $350 even for the total donations! Thank you SO MUCH to all of you who sent in money!

Woo hoo for the American Cancer Society - sure hope they're doing good things with all the money we raised for 'em! You may remember that I ran in the Sole Burner last year for the first time. Here's a video from this year that does a pretty good job of giving the feel of it:

Since I had found it necessary to walk three or so times last year, I wanted this year to run the whole thing this year, if possible. My friend Javier took on the task of pushing me toward that goal - he ran track & cross country in high school, so it's been great fun to learn way more about running than I ever knew before. Toward the end of the training I was able to run the whole course with him - even doing the "hill of hope" at the beginning AND end - crazy! I don't think yesterday's scafuffle helped too much - but then again, maybe it did! After all, they did pump me full of fluids and steroids. (Hmm, I wonder if I should be glad they didn't do any drug testing??) Breathing was definitely a challenge, especially on (as my friend Erin calls it) the hill of hope-I-don't-die. But I ended up finishing in 31 minutes 30 seconds (9:50 minute miles), which is way better than last year's 33 minutes 34 seconds (10:49 minute miles). Hooray!
So many thanks to those of you sent money supporting the event. Dang - I should have totals of the money raised but I left it at work - I'll update this post with it when I get back on Monday. Like last year, I wrote on and posted two stars: one in memory of my dad, one in honor of my friend Deanna, who beat throat cancer 2 years ago.

Africa for grown-ups

So. I created a blog (you're surprised, right?!) for the upcoming Liberia trip! It's called Angela Ad Lib . Like this one, it's enabled for e-mail or RSS feed updates, so you can stay as updated as you care to on what's up with me! I'll continue to post slightly more personal/general life updates here on ladybugblue. Oh - and I may re-post some of general stuff about Liberia from this blog - so don't get weirded out if you see a few repeats!

I don't know if this happens to you, but every so often I have these little moments where I just sense God's love for me. I had one today as I was finishing a run. I was tired and coming in toward home, and the most cooling beautiful breeze came up around and behind me. I knew right then that I was so loved, and not alone - a big deal, particularly if you're single. And I started thinking, dang, I'm kind of getting the sense that there won't be too terribly many cooling breezes in Liberia - how will God show His love for me there?! Silly I know - I WAS tired - but that was the thought. I'm loving the Wisconsin spring this year, and although I may very well end up not doing the 2 year project, I really hate even the thought of two years without the seasons changing and without springs. How will I know God loves me, there? Will I be ever be able to be out in the wilderness (where I so often sense His presence) without fear? How often will I be able to just be out in His beautiful world, enjoying it and Him? Will everything be crisis and heat and being strong and striving and seriousness and others and their suffering? Will I get lost in that, and forget how much I - like any child - desperately need not only guidance and wisdom, but love, from my Parent?

I guess I will rely extra-heavily on my friends and family - the other big way I sense God's love! Can't even describe how encouraging it's been to have folks listen, share thoughts, email, shop, hang out, brainstorm, and just generally be there as I'm sorting out details of the upcoming trip, and the implications of the bigger project. It's funny because 10 days seems short compared to two years - but it's still a big deal! And I'm excited, but I'm also nervous about it. It's probably the least defined trip I've taken to one of the more challenging places in the world. As one girl (who's been to Kenya) put it this weekend: "Liberia is Africa for grown-ups"!

there's nothin' that a hundred men or more could ever do

(more Liberia-thinking updates)

I've been wanting to write this update for a while now, but would not let myself till I finished my class! It was due today, so I'm done! I can't tell you how great it is to have that off my mind and be able to focus on other stuff now.

So the plan has changed: apparently "prime" - the main organization we'll be partnering with - still needed to get some documentation in that just wasn't going to be doable, so they're asking for an extension of the initial project date to July or August. However, they are planning to send someone (who's currently in Bogata!) to Liberia in May to start getting things organized. Once that was known, Shelter and the other partner organizations pretty quickly decided that that would be a great time to get set up as well.

The change is great for me. I'm actually going to be able to go with Mustafa in May, so I'll get to be a part of all the initial planning and set-up and contact making, along with him. Then (if I sense that this whole 2-year thing is a "yes") I'll be able to go in July or August and actually start with the start of the project rather than coming in midstream and taking over from an interim project manager, which the original June plan would have entailed.

The bad news is that the shift to May puts the trip smack over our upcoming Pictured Rocks backpacking trip. :( We're trying to sort out right now what to do about that - delay it, or do it anyway... I don't want them to delay it on my account, but I'm super-bummed to miss as well. Why do good things all have to happen at once?! :)

In the meantime (and in the midst of mad studying, and trying to somewhat-train for the upcoming 5K Soleburner run), I've been trying to sort out immunization stuff (this egg allergy things really makes things ridiculously complicated! - but just try to infect me with polio or Hep A or B now!) and read/learn more about the country. I've contacted one person who's lived there and now is back in the States, and I'm hoping to talk with her this week.

A few cool updates on the country: Ellen Johnson Sirleaf (the president) has been going around the U.S. taking interviews and promoting her new book. Just this week Comedy Central's Daily Show with Jon Stewart hosted and interviewed her - and it's worth watching if you haven't seen it (click here if the video below doesn't work):

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	M - Th 11p / 10c
Ellen Johnson Sirleaf
thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Economic Crisis Political Humor

Also, I thought this was a really informative interview of her by NPR: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=102866461 - it's really informational.

Jen got me This Child Will be Great for my birthday and it came in the mail this week - so I started reading it last night as soon as I hit "submit" on my last homework assignment. So far, it's great!

Regarding the decision: several things have fallen almost eerily into place. Example: I stopped by my eye doctor on a whim, just to see how long my last contact exam was good for. It was expiring the next day! So I was able to order contacts for 2 years (don't tell them I'll stretch it out that long! :) without needing to pay for another exam. Don't want to read too much into stuff like that, but I am grateful!

I did tell my boss & coworkers about this possibility on Friday - which is a relief. I don't like feeling like I'm hiding information. When I get back in May - decision (hopefully!) in tow - we'll try to figure out succession planning for my role. That will be interesting!

So, the plan is that Mustafa will get tickets for May 16-28 tomorrow - if that changes again, I'll let you know!

gonna take a lot to drag me away from you

thought I'd post an update of my current thoughts about Africa.

Lots of my thoughts in 2009 have teased away at the snarl of "what is it I'm supposed to be doing here in this world". I love Appleton, I love my friends here, I love my church family, I have an amazing job that I absolutely find fulfilling, challenging and meaningful. Aspects of my life ARE hard, but as I look at it in comparison to what the rest of the world faces, I really have so much more to be thankful for than otherwise. And what, really, do I want to see when/if I'm 80 and looking back on it?

I know the next "appropriate" statement for a post like this would be "Enter Liberia" - suddenly all that changes and falls into place and gives me meaning and purpose and direction. There's something to that. The times in my life when I've felt most at peace, most purposeful, have been when my whole life - at that moment - is focused on being where I am and doing my best within that context. The two weeks before my dad died. The weeks I've spent in St. Louis. The two weeks in Tajikistan. Even backpacking trips and travel. I love that feeling of, "I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing, right here, right now." All the complexity of my every day life (much of which, I'm sure, I bring on myself!), can be addressed and simplified by how it relates to the purpose at hand. It also gives a basis from which to deal with what's difficult about the situation (from being physically "discomfy" to extreme gut-wrenching emotion). I'm not - of course - looking at this 2-year project as delivering two solid, non-stop years of that sense of purpose, but I'm thinking there would be good doses of it.

Actually, the thought of Liberia has already given me some of that. When you have the possibility of that magnitude potentially looming in front of you, it does make many decisions easier, even when its tentative. Because to some degree, considering the possibility means you make some decisions as if it's a certainty.

But (and you knew there was a "but" coming, right?) all of that is hardly reason enough to completely up-end one's life! So then - what exactly IS reason enough to do so? What scale there that will consistently measure "yea"s and "nay"s until it eventually reaches a tipping point of solid decision-making assurance? Pfffooof!

So, for right now, I'm

• praying. Asking God to give me a clear indication, increased direction, circumstances falling into place, a sense of peace about one direction or the other.
• listening. Seeking thoughts and insights from folks around me, who know me well and care.
• moving forward. Taking steps toward making it a reality; watching to see if doors bang shut in my face or swing silently open. So far, no major bangs!
  
• learning. Sifting through the plethora of information on Liberia to gather the bits that yield understanding of what life there is like. Picking Mustafa's brain to learn all I can about the project, about Shelter for Life, about Liberia from his perspective.

Status at this Point: as best as I can tell I'm at a 7 or 8 on a scale of 1 to 10. Don't get me wrong - I'm terrified about this. But while there would definitely be relief if all this came to nothing, there would also be some pretty major let-down and disappointment.

Today I drove to Fond du Lac to meet Jen and Mustafa for brunch (they're in Milwaukee with family for the weekend). Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf, Liberia's president, spoke at the University of Minnesota yesterday and they got to hear her, so I got to hear about that and we also discussed more possible logistics (there's a chance Jen would come and help get things set up at the first part of the project - how cool would that be!). We had a lovely time as we always do when together, and I feel like I've gone a few more inches down the path....

domino adventures

You wouldn't think too much trouble could come from a nice comfy evening of playing dominoes, would you?

Tonight was a chill game night; just me, Tammy and Javier hanging out and finally agreeing on Mexican Train for the evening's entertainment. Last week I made the Best Recipe Cookbook's version of thin and chewy chocolate chip cookies, and this week I was going to try their thick and chunky version. Unfortunately, I was on the phone as I started baking, and I started on the WRONG recipe (have you ever done that?!). 10 minutes into it, I realized I shouldn't be adding cocoa and melting chocolate to mix into normal choc. chip cookies however thick and chunky they are aiming to be. On investigation, sure enough. I had gone a page too far and was making double-chocolate cookies for which chips were only optional. Jeepers! By this time Tammy had arrived, so she helped me fake my way through the rest of the recipe, ad libbing when I didn't quite have what I needed.

So, fast forward a bit. We're industriously combining dominoes and cursing as the other players lay down uncovered doubles, when suddenly the fire alarm goes off. My first thought is that the cookies are burning, so I run to the oven while Javier runs down the hall to turn off the smoke detector. Except that it's NOT the smoke detector. It's the full building fire alarm, and it's blaring incessantly. We make a half-hearted start at evacuating, when a sheepish-looking neighbor peeks out from a very smoky doorway and says it's nothing to worry about. So we return to the game, endeavoring to tune out the grating noise. Another neighbor knocks on the door, informing us that the older folks downstairs called the fire department. So we return to our game, and before too long hear sirens, then slamming doors, then the hum of a high-power fan (to blow out the smoke).

Finally, FINALLY, the alarm turns off. Then turns back on for a few more minutes. Then goes off, replaced by the beautiful, resonant, precious sound of silence. I head out, cookies in tow, and offer them to the firemen and the neighbors. One of the firemen tells me that they're not really supposed to accept them (something weird about if other people see them accepting them or something??), but that doesn't stop them all from taking one and going on their merry way. I get a chance to talk a bit to the neighbors, which never happens, so hooray for near disasters!

Unfortunately, the evening did not end well: I did not win a single round of dominoes. What-the-dilly-o?!

simple good

a weekend with Amy, Tim, Augusta, Chris and Sherman: sleeping in, breakfast at Delta Diner, skiing, hockey, and multiple birthday parties!

a weekend with friends: browsing music shops, drinking coffee, watching basketball (Wisconsin & Lawrence!), eating Indian and Korean, and staying up till 2 playing cards!






a weekend to chill: movies & bowling with friends, skiing, powerpoint for church, more wisconsin basketball, cake baking, and an improv concert with my small group






a mini-party at work to celebrate the 1-year birthday of our learning management system

Why I'd Rather Not Blog about December

I wrote most of this when I first got back Sunday night - but have been having a brain block about finishing it.
December was a whirl. There's been gorgeous snow this year already, so there's also been plenty o' x-c skiing. Yippee! The month ended with a 1 1/2 week road trip, from which I just returned. I had a great time - and am even a tiny bit unpacked - but still not QUITE ready for the start of the work week tomorrow. I'll work on composing my "game face" even as I work on this update!

I've had people tweak me about what I've been up to and why I've been so silent.
Sometime in December: had really good hang out/connect/catch-up/present-swapping times with Paula, Katie and Linda. Game nights have been fun, and have mostly featured Javier, Tammy, Jim, Marc, Ray & Becky. I had an amazing time catching both a Badger basketball game in Madison and a chamber orchestra concert in a Green Bay cathedral. Since August or so, I've been hosting/attending a Bible study-small group with Alan, Jean, Matt, Mariel, Erica, Jim, Paul and Liz. I also got to sing in a mini-choir & play bongos for one of the December church services. Hooray for good times with good friends.

But there are several reasons it's hard to blog about an entire month - or really any series of events that include lots of details and people.
Dec. 23: Patrick was in town! We got a good ski in, and then he and Tammy helped me madly make tons of my favorite cookies (a recipe I got from Dave Rosene - here's a "close enough" version), before we all headed over to game night at Tammy's.

For one thing, I have a hard time believing that the folks reading this would have interest to the same level of detail that I have in recounting events.
Dec. 24: Headed to Eau Claire for an evening with Mom, Harley & Jode. We sang carols, read the Christmas story, and did some gift-swapping. Really a sweet, fun time.

How do I summarize, keep things interesting, and yet give attention to the things that meant the most?
Dec. 25: Tony & Mindy had a brand-new baby, Julia Rose on the 23rd, so they invited us all over to meet her & hang out for brunch Christmas Day. She's precious, and it was a blast hanging out with Dahlia, Joey & Anthony for a bunch of the day. Anthony, at 6, plays Boggle with the 'grown-ups' and proudly takes the 2-5 words he gets each round. He can get 3-letter words, while we have to get a minimum of 4-letter words, but every so often he gets one that no one else sees. Nathaniel Joe at 4 is full of stories and takes the time to tell each one. He kept time for us while we played Boggle. Dahlia (2) looked adorable in white pantaloons and a bright-red velvet Christmas dress with matching hat. She loves shoes and playing with her brothers. She's putting words together, and trying to figure out her place now that there's a new sister around.

And what happens if I actually have an incredible time at five places in a row? How do I keep my tone from sing-songy-ness and my adjectives from becoming tinny after a while?
Christmas evening, I headed to college-roomie-Joce's place and hung out with her & her family. We had a great time hanging out, watching movies, playing games, talking, and eating. It's so fun to feel so welcome and at home at her place, and Ed, Annabelle and Brooke all make me laugh - they're all just so fun to be with.

Worse yet - what if I forget or inadequately recount something? I was the recipient of so much kindness and hospitality throughout the holidays. My cousin Abby recently blogged about unconditional love and it made me think about this more. It's hard to receive!
Dec. 26th I headed through some rather scary weather to the Hanks residence in the Quad Cities (between Illinois & Iowa). Tom had gotten there Christmas Eve; Mary, Matt & Kalina (hooray!) had gotten there earlier that day, and Nancy and Tom Sr. had everything all set to host a marvelous weekend. After a fun Christmas celebration Sat. morning at Nancy's (she's renting a very cool house in a tiny town called Preemption), we headed back to meet up with the extended family. Food, games, food, swimming, games, and more food - what could be better?! I ended up getting permission from work to work from "home", so I stayed in the Quad Cities & worked from there in the early part of the week. We had a blast playing more board games, discussing things, listening to bits of Tom playing piano, and holding Kalina.

On a lighter note, I like to blog when I have pictures to go with the text. For this trip I stopped taking pictures after we left the Quad Cities, since Tom and others were doing so. Gosh-darn-it anyhow!
Tuesday, Tom and I headed up to Waterloo where we met/hung out with Michael - his good friend since elementary school - and his family. I really liked getting to know Michael, his wife Laura, and their son Isaac. We talked and ate pizza and played Power Grid, and I got to hear all sorts of stories! They're the kind of people that you just want to get to know better.

And then there's the concern - particularly when I'm talking about a series of events like this - whether my excitement at various opportunities and joy in the moments I share will sound like bragging or an endless litany?
Then we headed to Jen & Mustafa's place in the Twin Cities. They had invited friends to a house/birthday party, and Jonathan, Becky, Ray, Ben, Andrea, Tom and I were able to make it. We bummed around, ate amazing quantities of marvelous food (no idea how Jen pulls it off), karaoked, skiied, winter hiked, wandered a bit downtown, and generally had a stellar time. Oh - and we played board games!

And of course, a Christian's blog about December had better include something about the birth of Christ and how much it means to her - right? Hmmm. I think on that one, I'll simply follow a good role model this time around, and "treasure all these things up quietly" in my heart.
Saturday brought the final holiday gathering: Christmas with Amy's family at Augusta's house. Amy and Tim and Augusta and Chris and Sherman were there, of course. But also, Amy's mom Beth flew out, as did her daughter Katie, and then Grant, his girlfriend Christy, and daughter Margo were also able to drive in. It was great that it worked out for all of us to be there, and we had a lovely time. We had an outstanding Christmas dinner, and great fun exchanging gifts (I got Bohnanza - uh oh!!).

Finally, there's the fact that putting words together takes TIME. Time that could be spent packing up ornaments. Or sleeping.
Sunday I got to meet up with Jody for a quick ski in Eau Claire, and then got back safely to Appleton. Hooray!

Speaking of inadequately expressing appreciation, I got to listen to some great stuff on the car ride home. One such "stuff" was a podcast of the Dec. 7 teaching from Rob Bell: "Who Doesn't Want In On That?" - there were some really great thoughts in it that I may try to blog about in the future. Take a listen, if you get a chance, and we can compare notes - and I can maybe depart a bit from this monologue format and go toward conversation! Phwew!

life is short, the updates might as well be too

• vermicomposting update: much sadness - i think the worms are dead. i haven't seen them at all for a week or two, and things i would think they would like are untouched. my buddy jim says he thinks i didn't have enough worms in there - he would have thrown 5 tubs in, rather than 1. might be worth a shot since i'm pretty freaked out about digging around in there to try to figure out if anything else happened... kinda bummed that i killed 'em off somehow.
  
• class update: i finished my last assignment! not like me at all - since i need to get everything done by thursday, this would normally not be happening till wed. late. i just got on a roll yesterday and got 'em all done. now to get the final project done! (should i go climbing tomorrow night with the crew??)
• thanksgiving plans: zah hoo - i'm heading off to raleigh to hang with my buddy tom. we'll be hitting d.c. and williamsburg and hanging with his sis/bro-in-law and their brand-spankin'-new daughter. can't wait - it will be so fun to traipse about historical places with someone who likes 'em as much as i do!
• hunting: this weekend! we'll see how it goes. i always miss my dad a lot around this time of year.
• sports: javier and i got a ramble in, then watched the packers clobber the bears and then wisconsin beat long beach in basketball. i think it will be a fun wisconsin season to watch.
• thinking about God: we had bible study tonight and had an interesting discusion about john the baptist. interesting to think about the life he was called to (being a hermit, baptizing people, getting beheaded), and that even in a life apparently fully devoted to God he didn't have it all figured out (sent disciples to check Jesus out, even though beforehand he had known all about Him). also been listening to C.S. Lewis's God in the Dock essays lately. tons of thought-provoking things. one is a boethius idea that God is always working miracles, we just don't see them most of the time because they're so drawn out. so Christ's miracles were a 'snapshot' of what God is always doing already: making more bread out of bread, water into wine - things God does with seasons and cultivation and rainfall. boethius uses that as an explanation of why He didn't make bread out of stones. huh!
• lord peter wimsey: i'm all about dorothy sayers' murder mysteries lately. i inflicted a 4-part video, The Nine Tailors on jim and javier saturday night (poor blighters didn't know what they were in for when the responded to my innocent invitation). and for reading - i just finished one and am starting another; good stuff, good stuff. witty and clever and unexpected - and that's just the protagonist!
  

Youth Group Work Trip

On Halloween morning six adults and 28 or so kids headed off in a caravan of minivans for Minneapolis-St. Paul. It was great fun. Mike’s (the pastor) goal was for us to experience different expressions of Christianity, and to help out at The Source, a ministry in the inner city. So that’s what we did! We did not get off to a stellar start, though. We stopped at Fleet Farm in Stevens Point and 2 kids tried to steal something and (thankfully) got caught. After the filing of the police report and some intense discussion, it was decided that we would head on (and the kids’ folks would deal with them on our return). I was personally really glad the kids were still along, and I’m hoping God used the experiences from the rest of the weekend in their lives.

• Hope Academy: a couple moved to a rough neighborhood quite a few years ago. They started feeling guilty that we are to “love our neighbors as ourselves” yet they were commuting their kids out of the neighborhood for a better education than their neighbors could afford. Because of that conviction, they started up a school which now has I’m guessing 300-500 K-9th graders. We joined them as they were having a fall carnival with their kids and needed folks to help man the duck ponds and musical chairs and other stuff. We had a great time, and thought the kids there were fun and very well behaved.
• The Basilica of St. Mary: on our way to drop off our stuff at First Baptist, we stopped for 45 minutes or so at the Basilica to wander around and take some quiet moments before the trip really got going. There is some amazing architecture there that I could look at all day, and it was nice to have the time for reflection.
  
• Christian Rock concert at Club 3 Degrees: yeah. I had fun playing pool with some kids down in the basement. :)
  
• The Source: I just like this one. It's a group of people that has set up an art community in one of the more sketchy neighborhoods, and just does neat stuff. We did similar projects to last year - I got to help hang insulation and drywall (hooray!). The kids worked so hard and were just awesome to be with throughout the day.
• Wooddale: A wealthier mega-church in the 'burbs. They graciously allow us to hang out in their youth room, shower, and eat pizza (yippee!). It's a beautiful facility, and a nice place to wind up. Unfortunately, we were at The Source too long to be able to make their Sat. evening service.
• First Baptist Church: This is the cool old church where we crash both nights: they let us use their Sunday School rooms to sleep in. On Sat. night, Mike gathered us to read and discuss The Irresistible Revolution - good, thought provoking stuff. We then split into smaller groups to discuss it and pray for each other - the highlight of the weekend for me. Then the kids took on the challenge of a scavenger hunt - Mike hid bags of candy throughout the huge, crazy church, and the kids spent probably 2+ hours searching for it.

All in all, a great weekend - and it's especially good fun to meet more kids and hear about what's going on in their lives. Really does make me think about volunteering more regularly with the group....

Photo 1: playing cutthroat pool with Tanner & Sam - Sam's taunting me because he's so intimidated by my mad pool skillz
Photo 2: this one's for Amy. :)
Photo 3: the group after a hard day's work

More photos (with kids' comments!) here.

some few updates

Do you ever feel like it's hard to keep up with yourself? Not as straightforward as pure busy-ness, really, but because there's more stuff going on than time to reflect on it?! It sure happens to me! Here's what I've been up to:

The Weekend Before Labor Day Weekend
After getting back from Colorado, I was a bit overwhelmed with... everything, and it actually sounded the most restful to hop in the car and take the 5-hour drive to visit Amy and Tim. So I did! I had a wonderful, relaxing weekend - no pictures... I was in too chill a mood for that! - but they sent me back with the best-ever sweetcorn and feeling on much better terms with myself and the world. We mostly just hung out, but we DID get to Delta Diner for breakfast on Saturday - HOORAY! - and just had a nice time before Amy's school year starts up again.

Labor Day Weekend
For Labor Day Weekend, I drove to the Twin Cities and hung out with my friends Jen & Mustafa. We had a jolly time, checking out the Minnesota State Fair, watching movies, meeting up with Chris & Augusta, going to the beach, painting the deck, and (for Jen and me) getting pedicures! For some reason I spaced & didn't bring a camera, but here's a pic I love of them from when we were browsing through this crazy clothing store in Nebraska.

The Next Weekend
My friend Tracy got married - hooray! Jen & Mustafa were my "date" for that one, and we had a great time. Tracy looked marvelous, the wedding was beautiful, and the reception was great fun.

The Weekend After That
Chris and Augusta, who hadn't been camping for like 10 years, met me at Devil's Lake State Park. It rained! So the fact that we were still friends at the end is a pretty decent accomplishment, right? It sure helped that we ate awesomely and our tent didn't get wet (unlike our neighbors - who ended up sleeping in the car the second night!). We had fun exploring around the park and thinking about what we would do if it weren't raining. Oh, and buying wet wood from the state park that we were assured was dry... and then trying unsuccessfully for a couple hours to get it going! (It wasn't just us - the night before we'd had a great fire and s'mores and everything). Luckily, we had gummi bears to get us through. I think we got through 2 1/2 pounds between the three of us throughout the weekend - Chris even took them into the tent with us Sat. night, "just in case"!

The past two weekends
have been much less gasoline-intensive. I've spent time reacquainting myself with my apartment (rather a nice place, really), and hanging a bit more with Appleton friends. There are definitely some fun things to do around here: going on walks, indoor climbing, disc golf, checking out the car show at Oktoberfest, watching movies, rambling doing PowerPoint for church, and so on. Oh, and reading like a maniac! I also took on a couple of projects, which I think I'll post about separately!

Clues to a Vanished July

Not exactly sure what happened here, but unless I'm mistaken July has come and gone. I would suspect it of not having happened at all, but I believe that July made a few clumsy mistakes that left evidence of its presence, and for which it has yet to produce a good alibi.

Strongest evidence: weddings. If you are a month who wishes to come and go unobtrusively, do not allow weddings! People have interesting habits of adding rings to their fingers and sometimes changing their names - VERY hard to explain away!

I, for one, am onto the trick: my stepmom Amy is now a Richardson, and has a lovely new ring on her finger. And I remember distinctly going up there early, hanging with her mom, Beth, wandering through shops in Bayfield, picking hundreds of daisies on the roadsides with her and strawberries for shortcake with Gus and Chris, playing with her granddaughter Margo, helping Amy get ready, watching (and singing in!) the wedding, and catching up with lots people at the reception.
But that's not all: my friends Terry and Anna are now BOTH Shermans!
Very suspicious, and the odds of it happening completely at random are practically nil. In fact, I will state for the record that I could produce distinct evidence as follows: Patrick and Aaron will have dated plane tickets that will show the to have flown to Wisconsin during this time. We have pictures of an overnight camping trip that Aaron, Patrick, Tammy, Serena, Javier and I took to Point Beach State Park the night before the wedding, and then more photos of the wedding celebration itself.
And now that I have July on the run, for further corroboratory evidence, I will also state for the record that I have memories both June AND July ending with bouldering/climbing trips to Devil's Lake. Now, this may seem a tad suspicious to you (perhaps a little TOO coincidental?), but really - who could make up a story like that? If you were trying to cook up a plausible record, wouldn't you mix it up a little bit to add believability? No, "for real", Javier, Tammy, Serena and I met up in Devil's Lake the weekend after S coolly moved to Chicago, and had fun exploring the flood-ravaged area. We got rained out not too long after lunch, but had a great morning of boulder hopping, rail walking, and swimming on a no-longer-existent beach.

Not content to leave it at that, Tom (who was here for work for the week), Ray, Becky, Tammy and I met Tom's sister Nancy and her puppy Poky last weekend. This time around we found that bouldering with a Poky makes it an entirely different sort of adventure, and that the flooded area on the south end of the lake was now "wadeable". We also got to top rope in the afternoon, and all of us got a good chance to challenge ourselves on the rock face. Unfortunately for the purposes of this post, I do NOT have photos documenting that second trip - I believe Becky and Nancy were the photographers for that expedition - so I will rely on them to back me up on this one. Becky may also be able to produce photos of geocaching last Sunday which would certainly help the case.

While the rest of my memories of July are somewhat blurred, I really do think the above at least yields enough evidence to prevent the month from squirming its way out of the calendar's clutches altogether. If you have items to add that I've missed, please do so - we really can't let this one get away!

propinquity and the cursed bean game

In the picture: (back) Rachel, Anna, Terry, me, Javier, (front) Katie, Joel, Serena, Tammy, Becky, Ray.
Sure enough, as predicted, Serena did move away. This is getting a tad ridiculous - I've had that game on my wish list for a while, but now I'm not so sure I want it anywhere near me!

One up side to friends moving away is the send-off party. We ended up at High Cliff State Park, throwing and losing boomerangs, smoking cigars, making s'mores, and tweaking Serena about ditching us.

On the seriously un-up side, it came up kind of quickly, and now she's GONE! She got a job with her company in Chicago, so we of course all wish her well. :-P To give her full credit, she has been pursuing multiple options outside of this area pretty much ever since I've known her, so I really am excited for her as this time it's really happened.

We will get to see "old" game night members in fits and starts over the next month or two - I just found out that Aaron and Patrick are going to make it for Terry's wedding the weekend of July 4 (hooray!), and then Serena, Javier, Tammy, Tom and I are flying out to Colorado for a backpacking trip/game night reunion in the Rockies! Zah hoo! We'll get see for ourselves if all the stories that Bill, Aaron, Patrick and Justin have been telling us are true (I have my doubts).

I read an article today that talked about "propinquity":

"that is, physical distance and frequency of interaction. It turns out proximity and interaction have a greater effect on likeability, collaboration, respect, and inclusion than virtually any other variable. When you examine social patterns or conduct surveys that surface friendship patterns, distance and the subsequent frequency of interaction account for a great deal (often almost all) of the variance. You like people you see all the time. People you don’t see, you don’t care for as much. In more common relationship terms, “Absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder.” The more likely outcome is “Out of sight, out of mind.”" full, unrelated article here.

If you're well familiar with the concept, my apologies for canvassing it here; I just hadn't run across it before as a packaged concept. I'm not sure how I feel about this one. Propinquity IS absolutely a key component of relationships as they're forming , and I think has a real effect on how close you feel to someone. But there are definitely people that I feel closer to, even when I don't see them for a long time, than I do with people with whom I have much greater propinquity (co-workers that I have to "work hard to like" - continually! - for example).

If I have a point, I probably can't start threatening all my moved-away friends to move back immediately if they want to maintain the friendship, gosh-darn-it-any-how. I hate it when manipulation and coercion fail to deliver. Am I the only one who's new to the propinquity concept, though?

Acanthocybium solandri

This, my friends, is a Wahoo fish, Acanthocybium solandri. It inhabits tropical waters and my dreams, for I am DONE with my organizational behavior class! WAHOOOOOO! I am off to finish packing for the Isle Royale trip, and get some sleep. I owe multiples of you e-mails; I will catch up with you soon! Hooray!