hunger and thirst

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled.

A while ago a friend challenged me about listening to sermons: do I ever really learn anything truly new or behavior-changing from them? After a lifetime of listening, is there anything now I'm ever really taught - that I didn't know already? It sparked an interesting conversation, but also some longer term thought.

Lately I've been going back and listening to Mars Hill's (in Michigan - Rob Bell is their main teaching pastor) recent series on the Sermon on the Mount. It's been fun to see how one after the other they've brought up thoughts I've never considered before. One such thought was on the verse mentioned above. Rob was teaching on the passage, and he talked about this not being about those who are already "righteous" – those who have got it all figured out. No, it's talking about those who hunger and thirst for it. These thoughts came up again recently as I read the following from the book Following Jesus Through the Eye of a Needle. Kurt Annan writes about living in Haiti and how he feels about being asked for stuff because he’s from the ‘States.

I feel occasional resentment. Why do I have to fend off this daily assault of need and requests when rich people back in the States never have to deal with it so personally, so in-your-face, so real, so everywhere? "Hey, at least I'm making an effort," I want to say, pointing a finger into the aggressive asker's chest. "Go bother the people lounging on those cruise ships! Or bother the people who don't even try to help!" But of course there's a chain link fence to keep that from happening -- and the Coast Guard patrolling the warm sea between here and Florida.
Trying to give through this fence, across this sea, is complicated. On birthdays we gave colorful stickers to the kids, which were a hit. We had a whole pack, but we just gave one sheet at a time since any more would have outshone the little gifts from others in the family. At the same time, they know we have access to more resources, and we don't want to be cheap.
We don't want to be seen simply as foreign patrons, reinforcing an unhealthy historic paternalism (combined with exploitation) that can lead to unhelpful relationships of dependency. We don't want to be seen primarily as giver-outers-of-stuff (whether food aid or cheap toys). But we also want to give everything we have, everything we could possibly get our hands on.
How to convey how complicated this feels? The "foreign aid" dynamic here is charged. I do know that when we've asked other long-term foreigners here for counsel, they've responded with phrases like "Good luck" or "Let me know if you find the answer" (pp. 47-48)

He captures so well the challenge of living in the most affluent country in the world and in the history of the world, and from that place SO wanting to be conscious of the world’s needs and in some meaningful (even if small!) way to help meet them.
Here’s where I’m at right now. I want so to be thankful. To notice often that I’m in no pain, not hungry, that I have a hot shower, that I can drive myself to work every day, that I live in peace, health, and security. I have opportunities – because of where I was born, my education, my job – that such a small percentage of people in today’s world or throughout history have had. It would be terrible if I didn’t at some level simply acknowledge that and just wallow in gratefulness.
I also want to be generous. Pretty self explanatory, right? But I do want those things I’ve been given – money, time, whatever, to be things I freely appreciate, and freely give. I would like to be willing to give to the point of discomfort, even, if/as it’s called for. This can be as simple as the “giving up a cup of coffee a day to sponsor an orphan” or into the more challenging realm of living on a smaller income so that I have more to share.
Unfortunately, those two desires don’t mesh together all that well, at least for me. How do I know when “enjoying what I have” has sunk into self indulgence and self centeredness? How do I ever know when I’ve given “enough”? I’ve talked to several of you and know I’m not the only one to feel a continual tension between the two.
That’s where the Rob Bell sermon really did have something new to say to me. I guess I just felt encouragement that there is blessing in the struggle. Giving is complicated: to whom? how much? how often? how careful should I be about the integrity of the recipient? All the “Haiti” questions above. What with being human and all, I so want sometimes to just have things clearly laid out. What’s the amount I should give/do to help, so that I can just do that and then have the rest of my time/money/life to do with as I like and still feel good about myself? Oh so the wrong question! Hungering and thirsting after righteousness means a continual process of listening, paying attention, being open, trusting, and knowing I’m loved.  Before the sermon, I felt that if there was struggling, I was in the wrong place somehow. Now I’m learning to see the struggle, the hunger, as part of the deal. I’m so glad that it’s a promise: that there really is blessing for those who hunger and thirst for things in this messed up world to be somehow, some day, put to right. Guess I’ll keep listening to sermons!
Oh – and check out this NY Times Op Ed article on a related topic – interesting! Learning from the Sin of Sodom.

swoosh

Ever feel like a leg that's been sat on too long, patiently waiting for the pain and relief of returned blood flow? Yep, that's me at the moment. Life since Monday morning, the morning of Aug. 3 on which I still heard nothing about the funding, feels like it got put on freeze frame advance. I'm not unhappy, but my time has been chocked full of stuff (good, fun stuff) that's allowed me to hold off thinking - or feeling - too much. It hasn't been good for paying bills, returning phone calls, texts, or e-mails. Neither has it been good for figuring out what to do with all the plans/ideas/thoughts that are hovering mid-air, silently waiting for closure or redirection.
I'm thinking I'll head up north for the weekend; not sure if it's to escape, or to push "play" again on my swirling thoughts. The "swoosh" is gonna hurt!

(One thing that has been nice is the amazing presence of friends (here and remote), and the excitement of co-workers that I'm staying after all; they're disappointed for me but genuinely happy for themselves. And golly it's nice to have people around you that like you!)

oh jeepers - she's goin' in

IRD is running into problems with the logistics of the project as it was originally scoped (they're finding it a LOT more expensive than anticipated to do the stuff outlined in the project). That means that pretty much anything could happen. Yes, Shelter has a signed agreement with IRD, but that doesn't mean they still might not change the plan signficantly.

While none of us really knows the future, can I just say that I've been finding it really difficult to cope with my two - and REALLY different - looming futures? Future 1 has the funding for Liberia all falling into place, and me heading out of here in mid-September with a few more shots and my stuff all sold/stored/packed. Future 2 has the funding falling through and me staying here, trying to cope with the bottom falling out of what I've been prepping for and figuring out what to do instead. I know that what will probably happen is something entirely different, but somehow the thought of Future 3 happening isn't exactly comforting - to someone who's already slightly on edge about the whole deal. Go figure!

So yeah, I've been dealing with some mild depression. Nothing debilitating; just lack of energy and initiative for much that needs to be done around here. I'm getting the bare minimum done, but it's taking a lot of effort. And I have lots of unanswered e-mail piling up!

I think I'm coping by existing on multiple levels.

The friend level - Honestly, I think this is a major part of what's keeping me going right now. I haven't had the energy to post about them :) but I've spent some fabulous weekends with close friends and family. I've also had just really good and fun times with the "every day" friends here in Appleton. It's been so huge to just have good quality time with people who care about me and who I just love and admire and like being with so much.

The work level - Work just continues to be awesome. Have I mentioned that I love my job? :) We're doing some really neat projects and I just have great people to work with and great automomy in getting stuff done. The only way that I know something's a bit "off" is that I'm completely emotionally exhausted at the end of the work day - that's just not usual.

The God level - Ok, so I think this one permeates the other levels, but also warrants its own. I've felt a strong need to slow down more and spend time praying and reading and contemplating. It's been really good. I've been feeling down but not unloved or despairing. Probably a good step toward having better reliance on Him while I'm still living in a culture where self-sufficiency is not only possible but expected. We need God here just as much as we would anywhere else, but we have a lot of easily-available crap that we can use to medicate and distract ourselves to keep that need at bay. Having my need exposed is helping me offload at least some of that crap.

Also - the college-age Bible study has been meeting at my apartment this summer. We're studying I Corinthians and it's really been amazing. There are some great thinkers in the group and every week we've been thrashing through all sorts of stuff and finding insights that I haven't seen there before - and I've read the book a lot! Just cool that that there's always more to learn - and fun how other people help you see stuff you wouldn't find on your own (and answer tough questions!).

The book world level - I've been reading like crazy. For me that's always been a great escape. And I hope it's not unhealthy because it's for sure helping me put some distance between myself and the uncertainties in my life for small amounts of time. I just feel guilty when I know I could go pack or organize or clean something and the energy/motivation just isn't there - and so I read or sleep!

Sorry to be so introspective and me-focused; I really don't think I'm the only person in the world with struggles! Thanks for being patient as I stepped back and processed a bit.

Amy, Tim and my first tussle with move preparedness!

Technorati Tags: liberia,misadventures

good weekend! My step-mom Amy and her husband Tim had just made a looping tour of the midwest and stopped in to visit me for the weekend. We had a lovely time talking and catching up, eating, and generally just hanging out. Tim and Amy got some time to explore Appleton while I was at a wedding. They also actually had some successful clothes shopping experiences, which I can’t help but find admirable.

We talked quite a bit about what would stay and what would go with this whole Liberia transition. The general plan at this point: selling/giving away the furniture and most of the toys (bike, skis, motorcycle), along with most of the winter clothes, many of the books and other stuff that is almost more “simplify your life” stuff than anything. Things that would be hard to replace, or things for which I’ve saved up to get something precise, would go into storage (mementos from my Grandma & Dad, cooking stuff, antique books, and so on). [Joy – any idea on what I’ll want for cooking/baking stuff in Liberia??].

Part of the original activity plan was to hit the Farmer’s Market in Appleton on Saturday morning – it was the first one of the summer and believe it or not I’ve never made it to an Appletonian Farmer’s Market! That plan changed, though, when Amy took a look at my closet. It wasn’t that it was messy, per se. It was squunched. (Hmm, now that I think of it I really should have taken before and after pictures.) And Amy knows me well: for whatever reason dealing with clothes just overwhelms me. In an ideal life I would never think about clothes at all – I’d wear a jumpsuit or a perfectly cute-and-comfortable outfit would just be there waiting for me every time I’d hop out of the shower. Amy’s put up with me clothes shopping, so I suppose she felt it was time to earn more jewels in her crown or something. Or maybe she just likes suffering! At any rate, she proposed skipping the Farmer’s Market and helping me go through my closet to make decisions about stuff.

I think I struggle because I hate feeling that I’ve spent money on something that I haven’t used to the “completely worn out” stage. And living alone, it’s just plain hard to be sure that something really should be jettisoned without solid moral support. So she patiently waded with me, hanger by hanger, through the entire closet. Ooof! I was – of course – quite crabby and miserable, but she knows me well enough to just laugh at my scrunchy faces and keep on pushing.

You wouldn’t believe how freeing it is - nor how happy I am that it’s done! Now I “get” to decide what to do with all the clothes! Suggestions?

Africa for grown-ups

So. I created a blog (you're surprised, right?!) for the upcoming Liberia trip! It's called Angela Ad Lib . Like this one, it's enabled for e-mail or RSS feed updates, so you can stay as updated as you care to on what's up with me! I'll continue to post slightly more personal/general life updates here on ladybugblue. Oh - and I may re-post some of general stuff about Liberia from this blog - so don't get weirded out if you see a few repeats!

I don't know if this happens to you, but every so often I have these little moments where I just sense God's love for me. I had one today as I was finishing a run. I was tired and coming in toward home, and the most cooling beautiful breeze came up around and behind me. I knew right then that I was so loved, and not alone - a big deal, particularly if you're single. And I started thinking, dang, I'm kind of getting the sense that there won't be too terribly many cooling breezes in Liberia - how will God show His love for me there?! Silly I know - I WAS tired - but that was the thought. I'm loving the Wisconsin spring this year, and although I may very well end up not doing the 2 year project, I really hate even the thought of two years without the seasons changing and without springs. How will I know God loves me, there? Will I be ever be able to be out in the wilderness (where I so often sense His presence) without fear? How often will I be able to just be out in His beautiful world, enjoying it and Him? Will everything be crisis and heat and being strong and striving and seriousness and others and their suffering? Will I get lost in that, and forget how much I - like any child - desperately need not only guidance and wisdom, but love, from my Parent?

I guess I will rely extra-heavily on my friends and family - the other big way I sense God's love! Can't even describe how encouraging it's been to have folks listen, share thoughts, email, shop, hang out, brainstorm, and just generally be there as I'm sorting out details of the upcoming trip, and the implications of the bigger project. It's funny because 10 days seems short compared to two years - but it's still a big deal! And I'm excited, but I'm also nervous about it. It's probably the least defined trip I've taken to one of the more challenging places in the world. As one girl (who's been to Kenya) put it this weekend: "Liberia is Africa for grown-ups"!

kayakkin'

I feel like I'm surfacing toward "normal" with the completion of my class. If you can call it that when you're heading to Liberia in 2 1/2 weeks. EEEEP! I spent an hour talking to a Very Cool Person who's lived in Liberia last night. Her name is Joy, and I found her by wandering across her blog, Finding Joy in Liberia! She was amazingly patient with a-thousand-and-one clueless questions, and I'm starting to feel less prepared than ever for this trip!
In the meantime (and to get my mind off it for a few moments) , my kayaking class just wrapped up. There have been seven sessions over the past 2 months or so (well, I missed one b/c of the Colorado trip), and they've been such fun. Did I ever mention that I love kayaking? I do. It's true. I will tell you why.

• You get to go places just not accessible in other ways. Sea caves & stuff like that. There's just nothin' like exploring nooks and crannies that are otherwise inaccessible.
  
• You're down low to - and almost in - the water, rather than on top of it. You're constantly aware of what it's doing, so it forces you to slow down and pay attention.
• It's efficient: you have a paddle on each end - so you can go nearly straight, which isn't really possible in a canoe unless you're an incredibly skilled paddler.
• You have direct, immediate control of the boat - and you can learn to do amazing things just by tilting your hips, keeping your head positioned just so, angling your paddle a certain way, and so on.
• It's an art as well as a sport - there's always more to learn, more to master, though you don't have to know too terribly much to just get out and get started. I think finesse is the word I'm looking for.
  
• It's beautiful and peaceful.
• You can roll! (or not - but it's technically possible!)
  
• You can camp - you can pack quite a bit more in a kayak than you can in a backpack > more food > longer trips. Or just more comfy things!

The classes were great because they covered all sorts of stuff that's good to keep learning - safety stuff, planning group trips, learning rescues and rolls, playing with different kinds of boats. I did get to the point where I can roll - it ain't pretty nor consistent, but it was fun to get a few decent ones in. I wore my scuba mask, which was highly unattractive, but awesome because I could see and it kept water out of my eyes and nose. When you're repeatedly submerging yourself for an hour or two at a time, that starts to be signficant. The other great thing about the class is the kayaking community; it's great to get to know others who love the sport, who are free in sharing their expertise, who invite you on expeditions (and might even lend you a boat if you don't have one), and who invite you after every class to hang out for pizza and beer. What's not to love?!

there's nothin' that a hundred men or more could ever do

(more Liberia-thinking updates)

I've been wanting to write this update for a while now, but would not let myself till I finished my class! It was due today, so I'm done! I can't tell you how great it is to have that off my mind and be able to focus on other stuff now.

So the plan has changed: apparently "prime" - the main organization we'll be partnering with - still needed to get some documentation in that just wasn't going to be doable, so they're asking for an extension of the initial project date to July or August. However, they are planning to send someone (who's currently in Bogata!) to Liberia in May to start getting things organized. Once that was known, Shelter and the other partner organizations pretty quickly decided that that would be a great time to get set up as well.

The change is great for me. I'm actually going to be able to go with Mustafa in May, so I'll get to be a part of all the initial planning and set-up and contact making, along with him. Then (if I sense that this whole 2-year thing is a "yes") I'll be able to go in July or August and actually start with the start of the project rather than coming in midstream and taking over from an interim project manager, which the original June plan would have entailed.

The bad news is that the shift to May puts the trip smack over our upcoming Pictured Rocks backpacking trip. :( We're trying to sort out right now what to do about that - delay it, or do it anyway... I don't want them to delay it on my account, but I'm super-bummed to miss as well. Why do good things all have to happen at once?! :)

In the meantime (and in the midst of mad studying, and trying to somewhat-train for the upcoming 5K Soleburner run), I've been trying to sort out immunization stuff (this egg allergy things really makes things ridiculously complicated! - but just try to infect me with polio or Hep A or B now!) and read/learn more about the country. I've contacted one person who's lived there and now is back in the States, and I'm hoping to talk with her this week.

A few cool updates on the country: Ellen Johnson Sirleaf (the president) has been going around the U.S. taking interviews and promoting her new book. Just this week Comedy Central's Daily Show with Jon Stewart hosted and interviewed her - and it's worth watching if you haven't seen it (click here if the video below doesn't work):

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	M - Th 11p / 10c
Ellen Johnson Sirleaf
thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Economic Crisis Political Humor

Also, I thought this was a really informative interview of her by NPR: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=102866461 - it's really informational.

Jen got me This Child Will be Great for my birthday and it came in the mail this week - so I started reading it last night as soon as I hit "submit" on my last homework assignment. So far, it's great!

Regarding the decision: several things have fallen almost eerily into place. Example: I stopped by my eye doctor on a whim, just to see how long my last contact exam was good for. It was expiring the next day! So I was able to order contacts for 2 years (don't tell them I'll stretch it out that long! :) without needing to pay for another exam. Don't want to read too much into stuff like that, but I am grateful!

I did tell my boss & coworkers about this possibility on Friday - which is a relief. I don't like feeling like I'm hiding information. When I get back in May - decision (hopefully!) in tow - we'll try to figure out succession planning for my role. That will be interesting!

So, the plan is that Mustafa will get tickets for May 16-28 tomorrow - if that changes again, I'll let you know!

gonna take a lot to drag me away from you

thought I'd post an update of my current thoughts about Africa.

Lots of my thoughts in 2009 have teased away at the snarl of "what is it I'm supposed to be doing here in this world". I love Appleton, I love my friends here, I love my church family, I have an amazing job that I absolutely find fulfilling, challenging and meaningful. Aspects of my life ARE hard, but as I look at it in comparison to what the rest of the world faces, I really have so much more to be thankful for than otherwise. And what, really, do I want to see when/if I'm 80 and looking back on it?

I know the next "appropriate" statement for a post like this would be "Enter Liberia" - suddenly all that changes and falls into place and gives me meaning and purpose and direction. There's something to that. The times in my life when I've felt most at peace, most purposeful, have been when my whole life - at that moment - is focused on being where I am and doing my best within that context. The two weeks before my dad died. The weeks I've spent in St. Louis. The two weeks in Tajikistan. Even backpacking trips and travel. I love that feeling of, "I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing, right here, right now." All the complexity of my every day life (much of which, I'm sure, I bring on myself!), can be addressed and simplified by how it relates to the purpose at hand. It also gives a basis from which to deal with what's difficult about the situation (from being physically "discomfy" to extreme gut-wrenching emotion). I'm not - of course - looking at this 2-year project as delivering two solid, non-stop years of that sense of purpose, but I'm thinking there would be good doses of it.

Actually, the thought of Liberia has already given me some of that. When you have the possibility of that magnitude potentially looming in front of you, it does make many decisions easier, even when its tentative. Because to some degree, considering the possibility means you make some decisions as if it's a certainty.

But (and you knew there was a "but" coming, right?) all of that is hardly reason enough to completely up-end one's life! So then - what exactly IS reason enough to do so? What scale there that will consistently measure "yea"s and "nay"s until it eventually reaches a tipping point of solid decision-making assurance? Pfffooof!

So, for right now, I'm

• praying. Asking God to give me a clear indication, increased direction, circumstances falling into place, a sense of peace about one direction or the other.
• listening. Seeking thoughts and insights from folks around me, who know me well and care.
• moving forward. Taking steps toward making it a reality; watching to see if doors bang shut in my face or swing silently open. So far, no major bangs!
  
• learning. Sifting through the plethora of information on Liberia to gather the bits that yield understanding of what life there is like. Picking Mustafa's brain to learn all I can about the project, about Shelter for Life, about Liberia from his perspective.

Status at this Point: as best as I can tell I'm at a 7 or 8 on a scale of 1 to 10. Don't get me wrong - I'm terrified about this. But while there would definitely be relief if all this came to nothing, there would also be some pretty major let-down and disappointment.

Today I drove to Fond du Lac to meet Jen and Mustafa for brunch (they're in Milwaukee with family for the weekend). Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf, Liberia's president, spoke at the University of Minnesota yesterday and they got to hear her, so I got to hear about that and we also discussed more possible logistics (there's a chance Jen would come and help get things set up at the first part of the project - how cool would that be!). We had a lovely time as we always do when together, and I feel like I've gone a few more inches down the path....

a little chat about Liberia

8:48 AM Mustafa: hey stranger

happy new year

me: hello!

Mustafa: Hi :)

Mustafa: sorry... we keep falling off the earth.

8:52 AM me: hey - how are you guys doing?

9:04 AM Mustafa:

we're good

how areyou?

me: I'm good, overall. miss you guys!

9:05 AM Mustafa: we miss you too

sorry that last weekend didn't work out

did you go to the wedding?

me: no worries

no - long story, but basically I ended up being sick!

Mustafa: oh I'm sorry

Mustafa: hey...a question

me:sure

9:06 AM Mustafa: would you like to go to Liberia as a project manager?

me: sure!

for how long?

when?

Mustafa: it's a two year project though

June

me: ahhh

what would I be doing?

Mustafa: it is a school feeding program

me: wow

9:07 AM Mustafa: our portion is the renovation of 100 schools

9:08 AM me: wow

so what kind of person are you looking for?

Mustafa: a good project manager, skills in managing/leading people

group of maybe 5-10

organized and plan-oriented

9:10 AM the PM will work with our partner agency, IRD, to 1) select the schools 2) lead the construction supervisor team to assess the rate of repair 3) work with the logistics peron to get the proper material

4) be the face of rep of SFL in the country

9:11 AM and reporting

me: wow, sounds amazing

Mustafa: well...if you want to do it, I can make it happen

9:12 AM even though you don't have constructio management experience... that sholdn't be a hurdle

but the two-year

me: would there be fundraising?

Mustafa: the project will pay but not a full salary that I had initially budgeted for

I'm in the process of negotiation and will know exactly how much can the project pay

Mustafa: and you can add more support to it

me: what languages would I be working in?

Mustafa: even a circle of praying friends

9:14 AM Liberian English

me: definitely!!

really?

Mustafa: it's old American slave English

yeah

oooooo Whiteman can lie-ooo

:)

me: I would seriously consider it - where would I find more info, and what do you need to know by when?

Mustafa: is a Liberian phrase

9:15 AM me: very true

Mustafa: let me send you the link

http://www.shelter.org/partner/serve.php

the last in the list

the person will also bear the title of Country Director

9:16 AM me: wow

(I know, I keep saying that)

Mustafa: :)

9:17 AM Jen too thinks you'll do a great job

me: she's always getting me into situations!

9:18 AM so what would happen with the fact that I know little about construction?

Mustafa: hahaha Jen's screaming from the bathroom

saying that if she gets laid off she'll join you

me: awesome!

9:19 AM Mustafa: the construction will be a plus but the main responsibility will not be construction quality control

it's directing/managing people

making sure the corruption doesn't take over

representing in the government offices, working with the Minister of Education

and even the president's office

the U.S. Embassy in Monrovia

9:20 AM so lots of connectiong building, accountability

and so on

me: really sounds cool

I know nothing about the country so I'm reading about it right now...

Mustafa: ok.... let me know, seriously, what you think

9:21 AM

me: wow, so crazy

so you must need somebody pretty bad at this point, huh?

9:22 AM Mustafa: my contact in the country is a theologian who will be part of the program

he's a great guy

Mustafa: so all to say that there is familiar faces

9:23 AM me: what kind of dress do western women wear there?

Mustafa: it's a secular christian nation

and Monrovia in 70s was a modern city

but no restriction that you'd expect in many muslim countries

their president is a woman

9:24 AM Johnson

maybe your sibs

me: :)

Mustafa: :)

me: must be!

Mustafa: she's a harvard grad

me: wow

Mustafa: give it some serious thoughts

and send me a resume :)

as if it's only serious if you say yes

:)

9:25 AM me: send you a resume as if I'm serious, you mean?

:) I think I can manage that

Mustafa: :)

me: thanks for thinking of me!

Mustafa: you're welcome... it'll be a beautiful opportunity.... I would personally love to spend a yr or two in West Africa

9:26 AM extremely different from the East

me: yeah

Mustafa: or Central, for that matter

me: it would really be an amazing opportunity

Mustafa:

9:28 AM alright friend, back to study

let me know what you think

me: one more quick question

Mustafa: ok

me: it says report to Director of Field Operations

who's that?

Mustafa: it's our Op director at HQ

he's an architect and a very cool guy

9:29 AM me: where is he based?

Mustafa: just came back from a two+ years in Pakistan

MN

me: dang, so I don't get to report to you?

Mustafa: I'm telling you... you'll be the chief

your first boss will be in the US

on the operations you'll work with the ops

me: just crazy to think about... but I'm thinking!

Mustafa: but because you'll bear the CD title

9:30 AM you'll have to work with me too

to develop new program activities

me: cool!

Mustafa: basically, besides project management, doing some basic statistics and ethnographics studies of needs assessment and best solutions

9:31 AM if we get more funding your income will go up :)

Mustafa: but it doesn't seem to be approved by our prime

me: prime?

Mustafa: it's a consortium of the organizations

9:32 AM the prime = the main recipient of the funding

me: ahh

Mustafa: does the feeding and food processing

we do the school renovation

9:33 AM me: good to know!